Liam Brudenell

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The power to be invincible to every thing but fire water tornadoes bullets explosions guns knifed blades swords grenades sticks pointy objects disease infections sicknesses flu illness natural disasters accidents cars busses planes vehicles trucks lightning electricity meteors bombs rockets drugs addiction peer pressure starvation tiredness torture pain monkeys any sort of animal heat radio active waves radiation humans air pollution baseball bats food poisoning and insects.

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the power to read word that are the right way up upside down, but not read words that are upside down the right way up

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The power to understand irony.

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The power to make your parents walk into your room whenever you're masturbating.

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The power to go part way through walls

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The power to turn computers into pencil sharpeners.

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The ability of telepathy but only when your targets are toast pieces, not whole toast mind you, toast pieces. This includes crumbs

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The power to shoot spiderwebs but only out of your fully erect dick

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THE POWER TO FUCK ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU SUCK

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The power to read someone's mind, but only if they're thinking of tacos.

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The ability to break all of your bones when you see any person

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the power to say candlejack and li

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(PS: Neo was the seventh Jesus, we live in the matrix)

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The ability to kill oxygen in a radius around you

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The power to die and get away with it

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The ability to talk to fish while in the desert.

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The power to pause and resume time, but you also pause yourself.

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the ability to fly underwater.

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The power to make your hair look curly or straight once a year

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The power to talk to your socks but only when they're dying...

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The ability to cut oneself on objects that shouldn't, in any respect, be sharp.

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The power to vomit whenever you want to.

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The power of creating poop.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!