The power ro make a spring onion apperar out of thin air

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The power to piss in a toilet when your drunk

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The power to read as fast as light when you can't read

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The ability to write a humorous entry on this site.

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The power to log out of Facebook using only your mind.

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The power to change to justin biber

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the power to fly only when you are sleeping

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The power to cure cancer, but cause death by radiation poisoning.

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the power to animate condiments

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Alzheimers man, the ability to show up where you are needed but forget why you are there in the first place

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the power to predict the past

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the power to give extreme diarrhea to only your grandmother and your house pet

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the power to charge your phone anywhere, but only when its fully charged.

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The power to see things clearly 10 Km away but not see anything closer than that

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The power to sneeze backwards

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The power to automatically register soda caps online, but only if it's Diet.

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The ability to defacate any object you want, unless the object in question is smaller than motorbike.

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The power to read Chuck-E-Cheese's mind.

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The useless pewer to increase your useless power at will! Moral: THE POWER TO SPAWN IN THE CENTER OF THE SUN AFTER DEATH INCREASE!

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The power to shit on command.

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the ability to shit active helicopters

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The power to shoot "milk" from your crotch at will

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The power to pass incredibly powerful gas at the most inconvenient of times

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The power to eat anything you like and still be fat.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!