the power to slightly darken the color of tree bark upon touch

The power to have all pointless superpowers, but only on the 12th and or 13th on january on a year that isn't 2015 or lower, but you have to be wearing nothing but purple underwear and a skanky hat.

Have god like powers but only on 30 of february

the power to time travel to the same time, date, and year

The power to poop in the worst time ever and you cannot control it

the power to fail at everything you do

The ability to walk on your hands because your feet have nails in them.

To change your eye colour when ever you want

The power to be invisible but only in the dark.

The Power To Make Justin Bieber.

The power to run half as fast as whoever is chasing you.

The power to fly, shapeshift, lift very heavy objects, teleport, and heal injuries every year only on the 31st of June

The power to change your urine to any color

The ability to transform in to a glass of water

The ability to be heard in space

The power drown in water

The power to teleport 13,000,000,000 lightyears but not be able to return.

The power to assassinate already-dead leaders

Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

power to transform into a dick with legs

The power to slightly disfigure anything made out of macaroni.

The power to grow nipples all over your body at will

The power to be superman on a planet without a sun

The power to bake cakes precisely 2.7% faster than usual.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!