The ability to be smart, but only if you study for the first 18 years of your life

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The power of having a bulletproof appendix.

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The power to hear people's thoughts when you fap

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The power of hindsight

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The power to eat three times a day.

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The power to turn into any edible object in a restaurant.

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The power to make your nipples hurt when you twist them

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The power to eat the booty like a poor person's groceries

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The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

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The power to get arrested

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the power to be physically attracted to the same sex

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the ability to cough musli in hot girls faces

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Power to sleep without eyelids

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The power to crap without pissing.

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The power to absolutely nothing

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The power to fall asleep each time you

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The power to spontaneously combust while nobody is around!

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The power to smell inside of your own butt.

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Have god like powers but only on 30 of february

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the power of anything you do makes you high and drunk

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The power to stop moral man from writing morals under every comment... Moral: The damn CIA cant go trough my battlestation, because I use this computer via proxy and can change my IP at will, so you literally would have to blow up the anti-bomb shelters in Micronesia and thus kill a key element of the pirate bay... And who would want that... buy your own music and movies? Download your own games? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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the power to slightly darken the color of tree bark upon touch

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The ability to give yourself any super power, but you cannot use it if it is used.

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the power to fall at 9.9m per second.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!