The power to fly for 2 seconds when jumping

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The ability to pirate every song you want without getting caught. However, they can only be Justin Bieber songs

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The power to give yourself the most intense orgasm of all time at will, but it only lasts for a millisecond.

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The power to break bones at will.

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The abilty to give yourself 0 subscribers on youtube.

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The power to grow a mustache anywhere but on your face

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The power to knock yourself unconscious

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Vanilla scented blood

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The power to survive underwater, while holding your breath.

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The power to hear people's thoughts when you fap

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The power to move at the speed of ripeness. Moral: Ripeness is actually slightly slower than time, true fact.

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The power to eat three times a day.

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The ability to lift things up and put them down.

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The power to obey gravity

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The ability to fly 1/2 mm above ground, and only on dry land... no water walking

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the power to sneeze whenever you want

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the power to be physically attracted to the same sex

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The power to lower your own ego.

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The power to look at Sun.

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The power to ignore useful information

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the power to stop masturbating every day

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the power of the home depot lisp... and as an added bonus the power of how the universe works lisp

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The power to only see glass.

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The power to shrink your private parts.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!