- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to find this website and submit a pointless superpower.

The power to have your entire body totally frictionless. Except for your nipples. They have a drag coefficient of around 5 parachutes.

The power to become mentally retarded only when you get an erection.

The ability to teleport a maximum of two inches.

The power to be invincible......... only when you are not in danger or harm.

The ability to pirate every song you want without getting caught. However, they can only be Justin Bieber songs

the power to make your nipples dissappear

The abilty to give yourself 0 subscribers on youtube.

The power to knock yourself unconscious

The power to break bones at will.

The power to give yourself the most intense orgasm of all time at will, but it only lasts for a millisecond.

The power to move at the speed of ripeness. Moral: Ripeness is actually slightly slower than time, true fact.

The power to survive underwater, while holding your breath.

Vanilla scented blood

The power to hear people's thoughts when you fap

The ability to avoid work when connected to the internet. Thanks, by the way.

The power to eat three times a day.

The ability to lift things up and put them down.

The power to obey gravity

the power to sneeze whenever you want

The ability to fly 1/2 mm above ground, and only on dry land... no water walking

the power to be physically attracted to the same sex

The power to lower your own ego.

the power to stop masturbating every day

Pointless Super Powers