- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to grow a mustache anywhere but on your face

The power to clone yourself, except all your clones become Catholic priests. Moral: "Mommy! It was HE who touched me!"

The ability to fall into 1cm cubed pieces when startled. No ability to pull yourself together, or move while in cubes. Parts must be reassembled correctly to re-connect.

open up pickles glass

The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

The power to find the end of the sticky tape

The power to grow the pinky nail of your right hand

the superpower of making pointless and lame jokes for which no human laughs (except crazy ones and apes)

The power to Rage Against The Machine

The power to make YouTube subscribers disappear.

The power to laugh at things, but only if it's funny.

The ability to melt ice slower than it would usually melt

the power to poop dogs without fur.

the power of the home depot lisp... and as an added bonus the power of how the universe works lisp

the power to turn everything you touch into gold......deja vu?

The power to shrink your private parts.

the power to shoot fireballs.....only when your under water

the power to stare at pit bulls in the eyes and imitate them

The power to eat food a little faster. So when you are done you have to just stay there for 5 more minutes for everybody to finish

The power to shoot webs, but only out of your ass

The power to find spare change in the sofa

The power to give yourself a migraine at will.

the power to burn your school down from napalm farts.

The power to make grass grow 1cm longer than usual.

Pointless Super Powers