the power to make a fart that kills people when no one is around you

The power to vomit every time you burp.

The power to turn into wood once you go inside a wood chipper.

The power to fly inside of airplanes

The power to become a virgin but only if you've never had sex.

The power to remember the funniest thing in the world and have a full on laughing fit, as long as you are at a funeral.

The power to read the mind of a cow that has produced a piece of cheese that has traveled 447,800 miles but only when looking at that piece of cheese

The power to speak a language only you can undeerstand

Absolute Defeatability- the power to be defeated by any and all things physical and nonphysiological.

the power to fire my lazer

the power to see everyone as a tree

The power to sing like Justin Beiber.

the power of mind controlling...yourself

The Power to believe you have superpowers

the power to smell like ham

The power to find gold in your nose but only when you pick it in front of others

the power to be like charlie sheen and relize that my score is 0

Each time to show up on daily live TV each time you are masturbating.

The ability to pass out at will.

The ability to give yourself a stroke just using your mind.

The ability to dehydrate yourself at will.

The power to speak any language, but not understand them.

The power to ejaculate out of your ears once daily

The ability to wake up at 3:45 am if you were sleeping, and not be able to fall assleeP again for 20 minutes.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!