The power to chew ass and kick bubblegum, but be all out of ass!

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The power to be reading this when you can WORSHIP ME! Moral: You love me, I love me, we all win! Now, bring forth thy sacrifices, women, gold, diamonds, women, more women, yeah... And if you are a woman, you can come many many times with me...

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the power to morph into yourself

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The power to turn your pants into underwear, but only when you're wearing them.

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the power to walk an inch above land but only on labor day

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The power to cum out of your finger tips

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The power to change traffic signals to anything that is not beneficial to you.

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The power the ability to read minds but only on February the 30th 1783.

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The power to defeat Chuck Norris but only if you can reach the speed of light

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The power to be immune to everything,except things that can kill you.

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The power to smell any point in time

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The power to smell people's moods

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The power of learning

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The power to compare anything to pr0n because "you know it when you see it."

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The ability to smell colors

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The power to transform into a homeless person.

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the power to talk to animals but only when it means stealing your ice cream

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The power to travel through time... 1 second at a time

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The power to make anyone you see look surprise.

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The power to make everything worse

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The power to exaggerate everything, a power a billion, trillion overly trabillion times more powerful than anything, like 3000000 Chuck Norrises, except they are all weak in comparison to this power.

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The power to shrink boobs by merely touching them.

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The power of women's rights.

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The power to defy gravity, but only for the fraction of a second.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!