----the power to hold your breath until your die-----

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The ability to turn anything into a belt.

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The power to fart slightly less deadly

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power to have no power at all

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The power to kill yourself.

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The power to cum cucumbers if you are a man.

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To be immortal, but injuries do not heal and the pain is 100 times more intense

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the power to kill yourself

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The power to buy the newest iPhone without the charger...

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The power to know when a painting is crooked but it only works if the painting is noticeably crooked.

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The power to have any nice guy, but they're all gay.

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to zap people but only yourself

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The ability to teleport to distant locations with no way of returning.

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The power to die

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The power to sneeze scissors

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The power to instantly make an accurate assessment on tomorrow's hangover probability well before you've consumed far more than the amount of alcohol which would guarantee it...and yet manage to forget sometimes you have this superpower.

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The ability to hear fish.

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The power to fly if you are eating.

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the power to die 10 minutes after reading this comment

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have the power of making chicken appear when your a vegan

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the powers to be a fat gassy woman

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The power to stay dry in the rain, while indoors.

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The power to be invisable but for only 5 seconds or the power to fly but only 2 feet off the ground.

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The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!