The ability to evolve into magickarp

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The power to die when you get old

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The power to die at any moment you want.

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The ability to add any two numbers and get 5

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the power to make food shrimp.

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Acid tears.

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Astral Projection. Distance: .3mm

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----the power to hold your breath until your die-----

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The power to fail a test everytime

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The power to open jam jar lids, however stuck they are.

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The power to cum cucumbers if you are a man.

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The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

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The power to be immortal until the moment that you would die.

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The power to become sick only to spread it to your enemy but you can't stop being sick until you have treatment.

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To be immortal, but injuries do not heal and the pain is 100 times more intense

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the power to imagine any women naked...but only as an octogenerian

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The power of x-ray vision but unfortunatly your blind

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The power to speak any language except the language of your people.

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The ability to transform yourself in to a vibrator that is about to be used. Only works if you are gay.

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The power to be gangsta, only in front of true gangsta's.

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The power is to think MEMEZ are so nonsence, Even if you ever kissed an girl.

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The Power of your footstep sounding like a horse gallop

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the power to become phil collins, but only after peter gabrial left

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The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!