The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

The power to read a book in 2 seconds but forget everything but the title.

The power to time travel 60 seconds a minute

the power to write on cellophane

The power of having all of Batman`s Superpowers.

The power to push "pull" doors

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The ability to stop farting so that you blow up like a balloon that eventually bursts.

The power to lose 7-1 to Germany

Liam Brudenell

The power to die and come back to life in the middle of a crossfire between two tanks.

The power to remove your foreskin at any given time

To be able to catch a speeding bullet with your head.

The power to perform incredible feats of strength and speed but only while on an elevator.

The power of christ ;)

The power to serve the Lord Dog.

The power to live forever until you die a natural way or get killed.

The power to die instantly from not reading books, meaning if you don't read books you'll die.

The power to skid against the ground at 45 mph

the power to only get an erection when a family member is looking

The power to lose your hearing and eyesight/

The power to be a limbless emotionless and powerless being but being a total Invincible person in return.

Super strength, but the only thing it affects is feathers.

The power to generate electricity, unfortunately, you're not resistant to it.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!