The power to teleport in the bottom of the sea.

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The power to not constantly thumb my comments up or down, whichever. Moral: Energy spent on me, is energy well spent! Stay proud and walk tall soldier!

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The power to make instruments taste mayonnaise.

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The power to breath fire with out any fire resistance

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the power of not being able to feel pain during constipation

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The power to be fluent in every language but only when your head is fully submerged underwater.

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The power to collect a interesting variety of ceramic animals.

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The power to speak in languages that no one around you understands.

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The power to take edible shits.

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The ability to change your weight

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The ability to hover slightly above the ground on Wednesdays.

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The power of x-ray vision but unfortunatly your blind

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The power to handle the truth. Moral: Because with the exception of a few good men... YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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The power to be caught sniffing your sisters panties and get punished by having her crotch forced up and down yours while your mother licks your balls.

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The ability to spontaneously get drunk, but only when writing your exams

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The power to grab a cats face

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The power to convert any font to comic sans at will.

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the power to turn into a cheerio at will

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The power to skid against the ground at 45 mph

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The left part of your body is fireproof but the right side is not

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The ability to sleep but only when you don't want to

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The power to drown on land.

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The power to get laid with whomever you choose, but they look and feel like one of your parents.

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The power to turn yourself into Donald Trump.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!