The power to summon cops to arrest you

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the ability to eject a little steam cloud from your penis every time you finish peeing.

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The power to stand up and do what's right, save people, restore order, preserve life, maintain balance and create peace but the lack of motivation to do so.

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The power to whant badly to have kids but you give birth to massive amounts of spiders, ducklings and some undefined type of small feline instead of childen

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teh pwoer 2 rite liek dis!!!11!1!111!!!! ex dee

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The power to see your reflection with The Mirror

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The power to eat your poop

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The power to know what someone thought, after they told you.

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the power to finish your plate of veggies when ever you like.

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the power to spit long distances at inconvenient times

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The power to shit yourself on a really hot day with no change of underwear

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The power to shift baroque and rococo era paintings proximately 2" up and 3" to the left.

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The ability to perceive the presence of light.... with your ears. (warning, blindness may effect abilities potency.)

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Power that makes you perfect in being useless

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The power of getting 5 cent shoes every year. Follow @lucb65 (Instagram)

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The power of dying whenever you want.

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the power to have access to unlimited porn but your parents never leave the room

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The power to eat, just one, Lays potato chip.

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the power to write amazingly neat but only with invisible ink

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The ability to have ALL the powers... But you have to have them activated by people you fight. Only the people you fight....

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the power to explain accidents when nobody gives a rats ass anymore

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The power to travel time at 60 seconds a minute

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The power to count exactly how many babies under the age of three weeks existed in the last 14 seconds.

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the power to be able to run long distances without getting tired

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!