The power to shit whole balogna sandwiches.

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The ability to teleport at a random point of the space.

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The power to understand that Jesus called himself Son of man, which translates into Anderson, which makes a certain movie make a bit more sense. Moral: THIS IS MY WORLD MISTER ANDERSON! MY WOOOOOORLD!

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The power to order stuff online with your dad's credit card

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The power to fart upon command.

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The ability to make someone love you but only if they are heavier than 300kg

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?u?op ?p?sdn ?d?? o? ???od ???

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The ability to glow in the dark but only when your really sleepy.

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The power to see at night but only black objects.

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The power to read any language but you cant understand anything it means

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The power to slap your buttcheeks together, then transform into a head of cabbage.

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The power to expand the size of your head and gain weak telekinesis, but you die in 3 days, the bigger you make your head, the more powerful your telekinesis but the faster you die.

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The ability to sense any and all ham in a five mile radius.

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The ability to fly but only if you're on the ground

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The power to be allergic to bullets! :)

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The power to go super saiyan for 0.01 seconds

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The power to increase the rate of plant and fungal matter growth by 15% by staring intently at it.

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The power to shoot pencils out of your mouth every 10 seconds

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The power to throw crazed badgers 3% faster than the average human. However, you would have to find the badgers, and they would have to be angry. The power does not affect your aim, only your speed.

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The ability to die whenever you think of death.

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to have a face with the power to attract fists

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The ability to survive without an apendix.

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The power to divide by zero, but not remember how when someone asks you.

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The power to become a destructive green beast that demolishes cities, which you have absolutely no control over whenever you get angry or scared.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!