The power to die when you do Anything!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +98

The ability to smell colors

thumb_up thumb_down +96

The power to find hiding spots quicker... like anne frank and osama bin ladin

thumb_up thumb_down +92

Be able to hear all the alarmclocks in the world

thumb_up thumb_down +90

The power to type 1,000 words per minute, but only on a 12 key tracphone ®

thumb_up thumb_down +88

The power to uncontrollably make your clothes dissapear and only in church.

thumb_up thumb_down +80

The power to only be physically attractive to blind people.

thumb_up thumb_down +80

The power to see in darkness when you're asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +76

The ability to identify commonly known objects.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

The ability to teleport at a random point of the space.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

Q: What is 1+1? A: An equation.... Duh...

thumb_up thumb_down +58

The power to understand that Jesus called himself Son of man, which translates into Anderson, which makes a certain movie make a bit more sense. Moral: THIS IS MY WORLD MISTER ANDERSON! MY WOOOOOORLD!

thumb_up thumb_down +56

The power to change your eye colour but you are the only one who can see the difference.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

The power to shoot flames from your hands, only its not really warm.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

The power to create a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that does nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

mime-o-moid. The power to pretend to be stuck in a box, walk a dog and climb a rope.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Oye sun teri ma ka saki na ka

thumb_up thumb_down +26

The power to know when an item of food has been cooked to perfection, 38 seconds after it has caught fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

The power to lose your genitals when you masturbate or have sex

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

The power to throw crazed badgers 3% faster than the average human. However, you would have to find the badgers, and they would have to be angry. The power does not affect your aim, only your speed.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

The ability to summon CHUCK NORRIS, but only while naked.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The ability to enter a coma but not be able to control for how long

thumb_up thumb_down -8

the power to hope you get a job at the mall because they laid everybody off and sent the jobs off somewhere cheap

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!