The power to make mediocre cabbage soup.

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The power to swallow chewed up food.

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Customer: Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! Waiter: I'm terribly sorry sir, please let us replace your soup with a more satisfactory one which is hygienic, and does not contain a dead organism. Customer: Thanks.

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the owe to sneeze with your eyes open

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Ability to shit nuclear waste

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The ability to orgasm every time you speak.

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the power to be as dumb as george bush and as useless as barrak obama

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the power to always hug people

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the power to freeze time by 10 seconds but in the process freeze yourself too - mleo1

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the power to breath fire but only on days that don't end in Y.

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The power to take your groceries from your car to your house in two trips or less.

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The power to have the biggest boner ever in the middle of a presentation.

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The power to have wood when you wake up.

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The power to get out of finger locks, only by switching fingers.

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A healing punch

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the power to sing like justin bieber

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The power to turn pizza into math worksheets. -Big C

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The ability to suddenly realize you have Cancer.

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The ability to make up a new part of Pokemon, every time you sneeze.

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the ability to troll the internet but never get a response

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The power of bullet atraction

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The power to have the strength of 50 old people

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Ingesting caffeine gives you the power to be a normal, competent human being.

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The power to have any pointless power you want

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!