The power to get a boner any time you want

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the power to steal 4 avocados in july at a supermarket at 9:37 am in your underpants without arms while a cop laughs at how stupid you look. plus while you do that a cute marshmallow comes and rapes your children.

the ablity to have giant erections but only at story time

The power to log out of Facebook using only your mind.

The power to believe that the only way is essex.

The power of having the highest rated comment

The power to hear a person's thoughts, but only when they're on the toilet.

the power to die when you breath oxygen

The power to speak to unicorns, even though they don't exist

The ability to shapeshift into any items but only pedophiles can use it

The ability to hear a tree falling in the woods when there is nobody there to hear it.

The ability to change the writing on signs

The power to ask sarah jessica parker, "why the long face?"

The power to flush the toilet in the opposite direction.

The power to be quite good at checkers.

The power to die when you die

Autokinesis (the ability to move your own body).

The power to be a human for 1 second once a month.

The power to build a building that is comparable to the sistine chapel, but without doors.

The ability to walk over ball pits.

The power to know the perfect rebuttal, but only after you've lost and nobody cares about what you were arguing about anymore.

The ability to laugh like tickle me elmo

Thhe ability to cry acid

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!