The ability to talk to parrots and have them talk back to you

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The power to shape shift, but only into yourself two inches taller.

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The power to have no power.

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The power to give automatically give all your money to a Nigerian businessman for a special investment opportunity

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The power to catch all 493 pokemon.

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The power to change the color of foliage. In the name of justice.

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The ability to make Mondays come after Sundays.

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the power to go on the internet, but only when there is no wi-fi

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The power to make hot strippers appear. The catch is that you have less than a second or else they become pedobear.

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The power to tell if a politician is lying. (They always are.)

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The ability to not make a face when eating a lemon, but only after you have already eaten 5 lemons.

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The power to read as fast as light when you can't read

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The ability to lose your temper, for no reason at all.

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The power to make anything taste slightly more like spit.

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The power to lick your elbow if it is coated with butter at exactly 36 degrees Celsius.

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The power to see your neighbor without looking.

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the power to shoot a powerful red laser beam everytime you open your eyes.

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The ability to fly, time-travel, be invisible, move at an incredible speed without wasting any energy, jump to incredible lengths, super-strength, handsomeness, charisma, and the ability to charm any woman on earth. If you bathe in radioactive liquid.

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The power to poop out you penis

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The power to copy and paste already told jokes.

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The Power To Become A Housefly And Be Immediately Killed By Your Mother

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The power to realize that your personality is like a shithole.

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The power to telekinetically pull sharp objects towards you at incredible speeds.

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The ability to control the internet

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!