Gay mens power to making straight women like them...

thumb_up thumb_down -10

The power to run people over with a tractor.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

The power to be fat only when your at a party.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

the power to be incredibly charming and witty but only around old people and little children.

thumb_up thumb_down -78

the power to know black lives do NOT matter

thumb_up thumb_down +165

The power to die randomly,for no reason.

thumb_up thumb_down +113

My charms is my superpower, but damn I cant shut up after spending some quality time with the ladies! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! MY BODY WAS NOT READY! I feel like yelling out my real name, but you know, if you know me (I am easily recognizable) the girls I spend time with would feel like I am bragging about them, and I am not, I am simply celebrating my conquest, you see, you came, you saw... BUT I CONQUERED! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT Moral: Feel free to thumb this down, my superpowers need to be contained, or else I will beep my way to an early grave! Girls, mwah... and you know, just dodge the kiss if you cant handle love personified, they arent homing nor anything... Should I ask my doctor if she has any medications that will help me wire down after uh... Multiple female company? HAHAHAHAAAAAAH!... The thought made me kinda sad, im better, now just to prove to my company here that I got balls of steel, I am gonna post this and let you judge me all you want! BECAUSE YOU CANT HAVE EM!

thumb_up thumb_down +111

the power to hear any alvin and the chipmunks song you want, but only when you have a migraine

thumb_up thumb_down +65

The power to triple-click in the time it takes a regular human to double-click.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

the power to die tomorrow morning.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

The ability to sweat caramel

thumb_up thumb_down +53

The power to piss with REALLY high force.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

The power to remember your past failures and all the pain you ever received every time you close your eyes. And you have no appossable thumbs.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

The power to go part way through walls

thumb_up thumb_down +45

The power to instantaneously teleport in front of your mom each time you masturbate.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

The ability to stop and keep people from sneezing.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

The power to possess every pointless superpower and be tasked with saving the world.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

The ability to fart with out smellling it only the others around you

thumb_up thumb_down +33

to create balloons out of anywhere on your body, and twist them into whatever you look at.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knowing whether or not there is an afterlife

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The power to swim as fast as Sonic The Hedgehog

thumb_up thumb_down +21

The ability to break all of your bones when you see any person

thumb_up thumb_down +13

being able to turn lead into dolphins.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

i remember coming up with one once, the ability to flash step, like teleportation, but it uses up the same amount of wear and tear on your body(and clothing/footwear) and stamina as if you walked a straight line there (say you were Stepping to the top of mount everest, the same amount of physical exhaustion and bodily wear and tear as if you tilted the earth, laid a flat board to the summit, and walked across it, and untilting the earth, all in an instant). where the only convenience obtained is time saved, but there would also be the issue of being constantly exhausted, the near limitless amounts of food needed to be consumed, and the constant need for sleep would make this power essentially useless except for convenience, you COULD say this is similar to stopping time, but with far more limitations, as its only used for moving from one place to another

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!