The power to manipulate time and space to urinate straight into your bladder, but only if you are extremely dehydrated.

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the power to dodge cars only when they are parked

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The power to vomit whenever you want to.

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The power to laugh at Tyler Perry's House of Payne

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The power to walk through walls, but only when your standing still.

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The power to give yourself a BJ.

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The power to grow giant, sharp and needly painful dildoes out of any surface just by sitting on it.

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The power to fuck everyone.

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The power to transform your foreskin into rusty iron.

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The power to get the bullet every time you play russian roulette

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power to poop out of you mouth and eat through your.... you know

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The power to die whenever you fall asleep

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The power to kill yourself at will

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The power to be illiterate when you open a book.

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the power to actually make clowns funny...

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The power to know the perfect rebuttal, but only after you've lost and nobody cares about what you were arguing about anymore.

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The power to Chang ur hair coler but only when ur bald

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The ability to pickle cumbers at an accelerated rate

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the power to fire your bellybutton lint out of your navel at a speed of 3 miles per hour.

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The power to come up with fantastic comebacks, at the person's funeral.

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Power to not Sleep during Finals.

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The power to fart shamelessly on the first date.

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Change the outcome of Disney movies 3 years before they come out.

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The power to fly and superstrength as soon as you die.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!