the power to turn food into shit

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The power to go back in time, but only as Anne Frank during the Holocaust.

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The power to assassinate already-dead leaders

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The power to die

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The ability to see women naked, but only if they weigh 400 pounds or more.

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The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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The power to see in the dark, but only when the lights are on.

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The power to see your reflection with The Mirror

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The power to chew with your tongue

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The power to only be obesely fat.

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To never remember what the word if means

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The power to melt plastic by standing perfectly still for a month.

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The power to do something as powerful as thin air

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The power to not see anything

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The power to type in the wrong capatcha.

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The power to have no powers

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the power to stare at someone without blinking or smiling for ever

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The power to see through glass doors.

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The power to get off the internet and do something productive

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The power to sing as well as Justin Bieber.

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The power to live forever but only in a coma.

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the power to not have powers when you need them most

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The power to dream about being asleep.

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The power to not get a boner when seeing a hot girl.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!