The power to fight Chuck Norris... and lose.

the power to take ipecac without throwing up

The power to make dead batteries appear.

The power of hindsight

the power to get drunk you are needed

The power to summon your mom so you can prove she's not as fat as the chav in front of you is saying she is

The power of fork-throwing. This includes large pie servers, spoons, and basically any other utensils that are not knives.

The power to make Q-Tips rain from the sky every month

the power to travel 1-day into the future by waiting 24 hours

The power to eat the booty like a poor person's groceries

The power to create a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that does nothing.

the power to poop dogs without fur.

The power to become the worlds most famous necrophilia pørnstar after dying.

The ability to know when, and which elevator door will open first.

The power to spontaneously combust while nobody is around!

The power to smell anything you look at, but you can't turn it off.

The power to drink as much tequila as you want without dying.

The power to teleport 13,000,000,000 lightyears but not be able to return.

the power to burp every time you drink 1 litre of soda/fizzy

The power to control the weather, but only in space

The power to surround yourself in fire, but only when you're underwater.

the ability to shoot with 0.100% accuracy

The power to die after life has left you old and decrepit.

the power to be immortal, but only temporally

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!