- Pointless Super Powers

The power to shrink boobs

The ability to stub your toe on every object near you when walking.

The power to produce highly concentrated sulphuric acid in your sweat glands.

The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

The power to be missed when present.

The power to give this suggestion a thubs up rating.

The power to fly as long as your feet the ground

The power to have extreme S and M sex with Rosie O Donnell at will, you as the submissive.

The power of absolutely flawless hindsight. -Credit to South Park

The power to flush toilets with your mind

The superpower to get your comment in the tops because you mistyped "the pewer to type backwards" backwards. Its a funny story actually, you people liked it so much that it skyrocketed past the correctly spelled ones and turned out top.. 40 or something? I am being modest here... just go into the popular sections and take a look. I would have told you it was me who wrote that super pewer but you would not really believe me would you? By the way thanks, it made me laugh, and I hope that is the same reason you thumbed it up, you people are awesome! Moral: It was me. (I mistyped the word mistyped itself which is grammatically incorrect by itself, now beam me up Scotty!)

Listen to Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black everywhere you go.

the power to ryme words with orange, purple, and silver but only after eating your own poo and while singing a beyonce song

The power to keep up with the kardashians

The power to make Thursday come before Friday and after Wednesday.

The ability to see women naked, but only if they weigh 400 pounds or more.

The power to control the weather, but only in space

The power to turn into a pineapple that can teleport into a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died because of a pine apple that was in a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died.

the power to turn into a tree

Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

The power to appear dancing like a girl at the background of every Justin Bieber "music" "video"

The power to levitate, but only after exactly 10 hours of sleep and you have to be wearing a tin foil bathing suit.

The ability to dehydrate yourself at will.

the power to like justin beiber

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!