The power to slightly disfigure anything made out of macaroni.

The power of becoming an apple tree

The power to use a rectangular prism to generate electricity to go on a square-shaped object full of pixels and create things with it.

The power to make a woman be quiet but only during sex.

power to breathe in water but when you get in to water you gonna die in 30 seconds

The power to have night vision when there's daylight.

Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

the power to be Justin bieber

The power to eat a ridiculous amount sandwiches without getting full

To be able to commit a sexual offense but never get away with it

The power to levitate, but only after exactly 10 hours of sleep and you have to be wearing a tin foil bathing suit.

The power to see through glass doors.

be a massive dickhead, like thomas bull

The power to have super lungs, but be deathly allergic to air.

the power to have to pee on a long road trip and there are no bathrooms around.

the power to not have powers when you need them most

The power to dream about being asleep.

the power to make your nose longer by 5 centimeter on command

The power to use your dick/tits as your cellphone at any time.

The power to turn invisible but only different parts of the body and happens at random times of the day.

The power to predict how an event could have played out, but only after the event has already happened.

The power to grow a money tree once every 5 years that grows 1 penny every 10 years.

Shit bricks I love itttttt

The power to poop without wiping

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!