Super strength that works for a millisecond.

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The ability to eat fruit cake without gagging.

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The power to ejaculate needles.

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Power that makes you perfect in being useless

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The power to remove your foreskin at any given time

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the power to run in slow motion

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To the comment below: You wont get a chance to miss me mortal... Moral: The color of envy... you wish you could be like me... everyone of you, yet some of you got the balls/pussies to prove it! For the people! For the freedom of speech! For courage and strength! For balls of steel! For the ladies... and most importantly... because I f*cking want to! NOW AND FOREVER! I AM MORAL MAN!

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The power to jerk off without using your hands

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To be able to commit a sexual offense but never get away with it

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The ability to gain more intelligence every second, while whacking your head on a pole, knocking out your brain cells.

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The power to kill you self.

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The ability to make your heart teleport.

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The power to erect your nipples at will.

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The power to get stuck to doorknobs in dangerous situations

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the power to talk to people off long distances,but only with communicational devices.

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The power to give someone any times of powers. But only when the person already has that power

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Th power to have a 10 minute delayed reaction, so if you stub your toe 10 minutes later you scream like a f***nut

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the power to have a combination lock, and forget the code

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The Power To Only Get Horny Around Your Grandmother

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The power to look into the car next to me at the exact moment the driver is picking his nose

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The power to unscramble an egg, but only after you've eaten it.

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The power to inhale carbon dioxide and exhale oxygen

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The power to live forever until you die a natural way or get killed.

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The ability to not live forever

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!