The power to shit on the ceiling

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the power to enter a coma.

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The ability to die on command.

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Ability to eat a burger without going to the mall first and talking to your grandma there for 45 minutes about how it hasn't rained for a quite awhile and we could sure use some!!!

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The power to kill yourself just by thinking about something.

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The power to travel through time... 1 second at a time

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The ability to become sexually attractive to Killer Whales

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The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

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The ability to go to hell.

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el poder de escribir en español ( pero solo si naciste en argentina) - ( the power to write in spanish - but only if you are from argentina-)

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the ability to be a super genius but can't speak or write

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The power to hear a "SSSSSSSS" sound, then be blown up.

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The power to cash cheques that are only ever made out to someone else.

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The power to teleport stupid people away from you - but they teleport to YOUR HOUSE.

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to make your bowel work backwards

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The ability to control dairy products

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being black

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the power to pay 1 cent less then what items in the store cost

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the power to animate condiments

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The abiltity to grow an additional 4 fingered hand from your inner thigh

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The power to hear in the dark.

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The power to read this.

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THE POWER OF PEDOBEAR!!!!! but only when theres law enforcement around

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The ability to be born, live for about 75 years and then die.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!