Ability to be Austin Calhoun when hes sick

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The power to grow the most sexy tits ever. (If your a straight man)

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The power to laugh uncontrolably in public

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The power of bad luck

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The power to float in water, and then sink sometimes.

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the power to move things with your mind in your imagination

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The ability to push "pull" doors, and pull "push" doors.

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The power to dance excellently each time there is music... either you want to or not.

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The ability to not have a super power.

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The power to wear comfortably wear shoes that are way too small.

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The abilty to go through water.

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the ability to invent cheese and toast

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The ability to sense every time your mom and dad are doing it even when you don't want to.

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The power to even

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Supreme pre-mature ejaculation.

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to walk 5 miles at 0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 miles per hour

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The power to not respond to gravity (only when you're in space).

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the power to detect when there is oxygen near you

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The ability to be blind, deaf, and mute at will.

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The power to swear if you do not believe in a God. Moral: Meh... if I post anything against God here you guys will thumb me down and that matters... it matters so much that I will use the section over to shit talk God... yeah... thumb me down already fearing zealots... show me your true power (being Gods bitches) now that is pointless power!

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The power to break bones at will.

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The power to travel through time... 1 second at a time

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The power to skid against the ground at 45 mph

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The power get everyone's attention by jerking off in public

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!