- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

the power to piss at will but only when your bladder is full

The power to moves in slow motion.

The power to shoot money out of your hands, but only when your body is on fire.

The Power to float on water, except when you're wet..

To have the power to breathe

The power to know what you do when you discuss the secret formula on the third Wednesday in January and it's not raining outside after we've gargled with vanilla pudding.

The power to blink 1.0000000000001 times faster than the average human.

The power to speak only in hashtags. #awkward

The power to iron your clothes with your mind before putting it in the washing machine

the power to stop sitting on the internet wacthing cat videos

The power to tell what a person has eaten by the smell of their farts

The power to break a Nokia

The ability to have superman's powers and weaknesses, but have an 100% chance to have a suit made of indestructible kryptonite.

The power to time travel two seconds into the future.

The power to jump 1 centimeter higher than you usually can

The ability to find the sharpest object in an given drawer, by having it puncture your hand. Every time.

The power to type a power on this website and see it's already taken.

The power to shoot projectiles from your eyes to the inside of your head.

The power to cum cucumbers if you are a man.

The ability to die, when you say: "death powers activate!" . You can only do it once though.

The power to grow bigger, but never smaller.

The power to walk 1% faster.

The power to deconstruct molecules, but only when they're part of an object with a volume of 1 cubic millimeter.

The ability to talk to anybody in the world, as long as they are within your eyesight.

Pointless Super Powers