The ability to replace your DNA with parmesan cheese.

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The ability to breathe and swallow at the same time.

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The power to transform into a green extremely skinny and weak guy when you get angry.

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The power to convince two people I am not taking sides while simultaneously taking both sides.

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The power to turn back time and get the word "emit".

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The power to breath Oxygen

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The power to self destruct yourself 1 time and 1 time only

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The power to make your self drunk using only your mind, but only while your driving your kids to school

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the power to produce millions of dollars but be stranded on a deserted island!

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The power to turn toast back into bread

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The power to know you don't have a superpower

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The power to shit out toilet paper.

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That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

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The power to let Raj from big bang theroy talk to girls without alcohol

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The ability to hover slightly above the ground on Wednesdays.

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The ability to change your weight

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The power to make every female cop want you... IN JAIL.

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The power to be hating when you see me rollin. Moral: ;D

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the power to turn food into shit

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The ability to unknowingly untaim domestic animals.

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The power to love me. Moral: I have enough of my own. HE TORTURES YOU BECAUSE HE NEEDS YOUR LOVE, I DONT TOUCH YOU BECAUSE I REQUIRE NOT YOUR LOVE, WHO IS YOUR GOD NOW! (still not me, Gods and super sayans are foolish)

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The power to walk through air.

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The Power to Power

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The power to win any game against a 5-year-old.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!