The power to have excellent wifi when all your devices are dead.

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The power to summon a green Hippo that would mush up your poop in your toilet. Oddly, the superpower is only able to be summonded one a year, sorry.

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The power of self-propelled flight, but only when you're the President of the United States.

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The ability to spontaneously get drunk, but only when writing your exams

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The ability to wake up at 3:45 am if you were sleeping, and not be able to fall assleeP again for 20 minutes.

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The power to give ANY girl the best orgasm she will ever have, but only when in Vatnajökulsþjóðgarður, Iceland. Between the local time of 3am-3:15am.

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The power to be any animal you want, but only if you are that specific animal that you want to be.

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The power to create another human

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the power to stand straight but only when you bend over

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The power to step only on the surface of lego bricks, no other surface.

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The power to recite all of Encyclopedia Brown's cases in alphabetical order.

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The ability to irreversibly turn into a turkey days before thanksgiving.

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The power to count exactly how many babies under the age of three weeks existed in the last 14 seconds.

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The power to grow plants, only using your mind

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the power to flick a coin and get heads 50% of the time.

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The power to become a frog when a snake sees you

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The power to stand in line at the DMV with a smile on your face.

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The power to control yourself

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The power to occasionally mistake your hand for a bear.

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the power to fold a piece of paper in half 8 times

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The power to walk on water... but drown in land.

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the power to eat 10 cotton balls every year

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The ability to "Right Click" Properties

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The power to have diarrhea at any time

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!