The power to travel through time... 1 second at a time

The power grow arm pit hair 5 times faster and 5 times longer than it was after shaving.

The power to punch anyone as hard as you want but get hit with the same force in your genitals

The power uncontrollably self destruct when you feel safe.

The power to talk to plants but only when they have mean things to say.

the power to ryme words with orange, purple, and silver but only after eating your own poo and while singing a beyonce song

The power to stand up and do what's right, save people, restore order, preserve life, maintain balance and create peace but the lack of motivation to do so.

The power of x-ray vision but unfortunatly your blind

To be able to immediately know the name of anything you see

The power to know what someone thought, after they told you.

The power to make Macs appear instantly, but be unable to left-click on them.

The amazing ability to shoot any liquid substance out of your eyes, with a requirement being you must douse your eyes with the substance beforehand.

The power to fly 3 inches.

The power to walk on water, but only if its temperature is below 0° C

The power to change the temperature by 1 degree, once every leap year.

You can hear what people think ...in sign language.

The power to eat, just one, Lays potato chip.

Being able to transform into anything on and off the planet, only, you have to be touching that object.

The power of flight but only when you're within three feet of another person.

The power throw up hockey pucks every few minutes.

the power to be a free wireless hotspot only when you are completely motionless.

The power to sing Friday by Rebecca Black perfectly when it's thursday.

The ability to teleport 1 step forward at will at a walking pace.

The ability to run faster than the speed of sound, but only when laying down.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!