to eat a pie and get to fart an apple (cus why not)

thumb_up thumb_down +77

The ability to talk to anybody in the world, as long as they are within your eyesight.

thumb_up thumb_down +73

The power of being negative all the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +73

the power to make an earthquake that an ant can not even feel

thumb_up thumb_down +73

the power to predict the outcome of any event after it's already happened

thumb_up thumb_down +73

The power to know you don't have a superpower

thumb_up thumb_down +71

The ability to teleport to any place in the universe, but only if it is currently occupied by something else

thumb_up thumb_down +71

The power to play all Videogames you want, but you have to pay the original price for them.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

The power to fly if you are eating.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

the power to make plants grow at a slightly excelled rate when lying on top of them .... you also smell like shit, all the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

The power to get a cold in the wintertime.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

The power to make fires bigger, but cant control them

thumb_up thumb_down +65

I HAVE A TINY PINGAS! (Penis) Moral: Ladyfriend here daring me to post this here, PFF! Is that even a dare? I got balls of steel! Oh, and I should totally ask my doctor if she can give me something that helps me unwind after multiple female company, or at least they are daring me all to type that pff! Im not even good looking... And noooooo, nobody dared me to type that, they want todeeeeeeeeeellllllllteeeeeeeeee tht BUTI SHALLOOOWWWWWWINSSSSSSSS

thumb_up thumb_down +65

The power to read everything 2 seconds faster than usual

thumb_up thumb_down +61

The power to summon huge snowstorms, but only on the weekend.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

The power to touch the ground using only your feet

thumb_up thumb_down +61

The ability to recognize any meme at will.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

You know what they say! The power to make all toasters... Toast Toast!

thumb_up thumb_down +55

The power to do a wheelie on. Unicycle

thumb_up thumb_down +53

The power to see everything that will happen in your future life when you die.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

The power to change your eye color.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

The power to shit yourself on a really hot day with no change of underwear

thumb_up thumb_down +51

The power to menstruate from your eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

The ability to levitate birds

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!