the power to get a 100" erection but only over your dead greatgrandma

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The power to escape reality by entering the magical land of skyrim via your PS3.

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The power to be so fast, that if you sprint forward you travel the whole world just in time to fuck yourself.

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The power to be Chuck Norris

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the power to wake up 2 seconds before your alarm.

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The power to speak Italian fluently while dining in a Chinese restaurant.

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the power to predict the outcome of any event after it's already happened

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The power to know you don't have a superpower

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The ability to read. No wait that is actually helpful. Never mind.

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The power to hole 1 inch putts.

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the power to shoot fireballs only when your underwater

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The ability to know what time it is when looking at a working clock.

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The power to play all Videogames you want, but you have to pay the original price for them.

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I HAVE A TINY PINGAS! (Penis) Moral: Ladyfriend here daring me to post this here, PFF! Is that even a dare? I got balls of steel! Oh, and I should totally ask my doctor if she can give me something that helps me unwind after multiple female company, or at least they are daring me all to type that pff! Im not even good looking... And noooooo, nobody dared me to type that, they want todeeeeeeeeeellllllllteeeeeeeeee tht BUTI SHALLOOOWWWWWWINSSSSSSSS

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The power to say things twice. The power to say things twice.

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The power to be stupid

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The ability to get shot, for real.

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The power to have 50%-78% water in your body

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The power to lose this power.

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Acid tears.

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the power to eat bread

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The power to be able to see words backwards, but not any faster than the average mentally handicapped person can read backwards.

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The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

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The power to read everything 2 seconds faster than usual

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!