The power to summon Wolverine, but only so he can give you a colonoscopy.

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The power to turn brass into gold, but only when the brass is made of gold.

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Ability to eat a burger without going to the mall first and talking to your grandma there for 45 minutes about how it hasn't rained for a quite awhile and we could sure use some!!!

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The power to wiggle your toes unless they're tomatoes..

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The Power To Make Justin Bieber.

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The power to read minds, but only those of dead people.

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The power to heal yourself but only damage you inflict on yourself.

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The power to summon huge snowstorms, but only on the weekend.

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The power to ignore useful information

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the power to see through hills , but only in saskatchewan

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ability to swim superhuman fast, but only if you're completely naked and dry

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the ability to die but to reappear as a strange families pet turkey

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The power to urinate in mouth.

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The power to display emotions at will

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The ability to find a squirrels nuts

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the power to SHUT UP ALREADY!

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The power to think salmon.

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The power to fly only one inch off the ground

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The ability to turn anything into a belt.

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The power to have an ejaculate in your pants by looking a girl in the eyes.

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The power to correctly guess how old shag rugs are

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cry acid tears

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The power to save all that time your new fast boil kettle has saved you

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The Power to be more useless then the most useless object in the world.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!