The power to make any single girl instantly reach for her Mace.

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The power to turn into any cat which is about to give birth.

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The power to run at the speed of invisibility.

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The power to stop existing.

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The power to set money on fire

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The power to be invisable when your dead

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The power to look at someone and imaginatively initiate intercourse in the most unreasonable way possible.

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The power to run at the speed of ligth but only when running complete circles

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The power to change the color of your arm hair.

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The power to be black, but only if you are at a KKK meeting

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the power to lower my blood presure to dangerous levels

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The ability to evolve into magickarp

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The power to waste time coming up with pointless super powers

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The power to be a woman

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The power to do reverse moonwalk

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The power to sit on a couch whenever your mother tells you that you can.

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the power to talk to animals.......without them understanding you.

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The power to smell bacon and/or ham at 3 o clock in the afternoon on the second Saturday of March

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to be shitty

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The power to become Santa Clause, but only on the fourth of July.

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The power to make clean socks dirty.

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Perfect recall of every episode of Teletubies

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The ability to make any girl hook up with you, while your penis is numb

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The power to get hard at will.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!