the power to fire angry ticks out of your nipples

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The power to become a forensic paranoiac raving lunatic at will... HEY! YOU! Why are you gonna give my comment a thumbs down eh? AND WHY A THUMBS UP? Are you gonna hack my account and kill my family? OH YEAH! OH YEAH? I AM GONNA KILL THEM MYSELF JUST TO TAKE IT AWAY FROM YOU! BAHAHAHAHA!

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The power to achieve 98% opacity

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the power to make a super smelly fart every time you eat 40 cotton balls

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Incredible Slothman. The power to move slowly.

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The power to watch a movie without falling asleep through most of it

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The power to think of pointless powers.

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The power to have your right hand permanently glued to your face.

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The power to bleed anally at will

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the power to make thin air that is harmless

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the ability to click your fingers and lose your hands

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The power to go in jail every time you are alone.

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the power to kill plants in a desert.

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the power to have the remote come to you.

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The power to automatically yell every action you do like in a Japanese fighting game, I once started doing this for fun, at the end of the day eveyone hated me, good luck. (OPEN DOOR! OPEN DOOR! CLOSE DOOR! POOL SHOT! CUMMING HARD CUMMING HARD! SONIC BOOM! BEING TOLD TO SHUT UP! BEING TOLD TO SHUT UP! TAKING A PUNCH TO THE FACE UPPERCUT!)

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The ability to fly up 3feet travel to travel a meter forwards

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The power to be mario for 10 seconds then you vomit shit for 17 hours. this happens every week.

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the power to fart your way to the moon

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The ability to be Edward Cullen

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The power to walk on frozen water.

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The power to sound like a 12 year old while playing call of duty

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The power to finger some one in the arse so they shit them self.

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The power to do nothing with your life.

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the power to talk to animals.......without them understanding you.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!