The power to give your grandma amazing orgasms.

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The power to make cats ask for cheeseburgers in comically broken English

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The ability to fly up 3feet travel to travel a meter forwards

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The power of women's rights.

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The power to make things disappear when I shut my eyes, then bring them back when I open them.

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The power to set yourself on fire but be immune to flames

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???q? ?o?? sp??oq??? ?nq ????u o? ???l?q? ???

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The power to spell words incorrectly when speaking.

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the power to be an incest pedo called jack sanders.

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The power to make birds levitate as you walk by them.

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Eclairvoiance: The ability to forsee when you will eat your next cream-filled, chocolate coated pastry...

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The power to eat ass.

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The power to secrete concentrated orange juice from your toes every time you secrete concentrated orange juice from your toes.

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The power to teleport to the middle of the Pacific Ocean

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The power to solve every problem in the world. By dying.

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The power to have withdrawal symptoms.

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the ability to constantly have the fever

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The power to shit yourself whenever other people are looking at you

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Your mom is so ugly, she was mercilessly bullied through high school and had severe depression and self-esteem issues. The power to post anti-jokes only on pointless superpowers.

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The power to get hurt without a break.

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The power to shoot iron from your blood

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the power of breath 10 times per second of you will die

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The power to teleport but only on the surface of the sun.

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the power of being yourself

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!