The ability to drop everything you hold

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The power to fart really smelly :P

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xray vision , but you must close your eyes

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The power to consume extrement and expire. Nero: This is simply my seal of quality.

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THE POWER TO FIX MY CAPSLOCK

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The power to be unkillable when you'r not in danger.

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the power to teleport to the bottom of the ocean at will

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The power to not be able to touch any living thing.

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The power to talk to animals and have them partially understand you.

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The power to kill yourself just by thinking about something.

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To get to know everything Jack Nicholson has said yet you blurb out his comments and random and by the time you face this YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: You think this entry was boring? It is great actually, what? You say it sucks? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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The ability to be bulletproof after you get shot.

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The power to speak parseltongue except when you're around snakes.

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the ability to lick your own anus

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The ability to kick in a three point shot but only during a game.

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The power to telekinetically pick your nose and eat it.

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the ability to write using your 'inside' voice but only once your vocal cords are compromised

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The power to not have powers that arent pointless but then you realize your a normal human bein then you just think hey mabey I can be like Batman but then also you were like hey why am I not a multi-billionaire . After this all you find out you have the power to wake up at 12 pm only while using a alarm clock set for 7 am

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The ability to fly but, if you use it, birds start flocking around you and shitting on you.

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Power to freeze your self in time but everyone else can move, but you cant

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The power to lose your genitals when you masturbate or have sex

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Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

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The power to just eat one lays potato chip

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The power to paint with all the colors of the wind!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!