The power to never sleep and instead go outside and think about your life.

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A man with the power to make sandwiches.

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The power to care for anything and nothing.

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The power to know every language except for ones spoken in the country your in.

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The power to become any animal, but you have to be touching that animal to transform and it can only be a rat.

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The power to write complete sentenc

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The power to be unkillable when you'r not in danger.

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The ability to turn invisible... when noone is looking

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The power to perfectly tie a Cherry stem in your mouth only while your in and elevator going down in Shanghai on the fourth shortest tower with a pink roof

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The power to look at Chuck Norris. I dare you to try.

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The power to speak parseltongue except when you're around snakes.

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The power to run faster that a chetah when asleep, but to move as fast a snail when awake.

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The power to telekinetically pick your nose and eat it.

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The ability to make red lights turn green by simply staring and waiting

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The power to cheat death, but only when your alive...

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The power to make poorly drawn art in less time than it takes to blink.

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The power to post hundreds of pointless superpowers in minutes. Moral: It is always fun to see another person`s comment between mine with zero thumbs, while mine always keep the excellent two thumb quality! Lesser man would say thank you... I say you are welcome everybody ;) (A moral man original, because someone needs the balls of steel required to see things how they really are)

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The power to have a power

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The power to change any text in sight from US to British spelling.

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The power of reincarnate but have absolutely no memory of your previous lives.

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Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

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The ability to know everything and get anything you want, but you must poop out a poop the size of a horse.

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The power to teleport to the last place you shit.

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The power to do anything as if you were god but only after you slay a mythical dragon and eat an Unicorn's poop.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!