The power to shoot lasers from your eyes when you eyes are closed

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The ability to select which ad you want to be shown on any website, but only once per day.

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Hat seduction. 'Nuff said.

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The power to become a carrot.

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the power to read impossibly fast, but only when you're watching a movie with no subtitles

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The power to tickle your own feet.

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Ability to shit nuclear waste

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The power to taste anything you smell.

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The power to shrink tits by touching them.

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The power to watch tv while sleeping

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xray vision , but you must close your eyes

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The power to eat mayonnaise , but only when you do so, you become able to breath underwater for thirteen seconds!

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The power to run faster that a chetah when asleep, but to move as fast a snail when awake.

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The power to hover 1 foot off of the ground.

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the ability to lick your own anus

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The power to believe in yourself, when you can believe in me. Moral: BECAUSE I BELIEVE IN YOU!

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The power to random things that you touch into the same thing but a different color

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the power to move up floors or levels,but only in an elevator

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the power get massive erections but you are only aroused buy new born babies or near death old men and women.

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The power to have amazing sexual prowess for 24 straight hours, but only on days that you have to work overtime. This is actually true.

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the ability to write using your 'inside' voice but only once your vocal cords are compromised

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The power to summon your mom so you can prove she's not as fat as the chav in front of you is saying she is

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The power to have intense orgasms, but only if you choke yourself.

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The power to understand the purpose of life, and every other world mystery, exactly .5 of a second before you die.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!