The power to buy "I cant believe its not butter" and turn the damn thing into real butter.

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The power to hold your breath forever, but only in a hot-tub.

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the power to turn invisible when no one else is around.

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A healing punch

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The power to understand a joke 30 seconds later after the last person in the group did it.

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The power to see extremely far, and to see trough everything except yourself. Congrats you are stuck with seeing your own ass wherever you go for the rest of your life. Yeh i am moral man whatevs...

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Having the ability to drink bleach and not die. You only get really sick.

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power to eat through your but

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The power to make terrible puns and drink ketchup non-stop, otherwise known as being Sans.

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The power to ma-FUK HER RIGHT IN THE PUSY

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The power to be super strong, but you have to be totally wasted for it to work.

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The power to open shampoo and conditioner bottles by blinking.

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the power to ejaculate lava.

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The ppwer to say SHAZAM, Then someone says wat?

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The power to change your eye colour but you are the only one who can see the difference.

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The power to have every single power you can imagine but not able to use any of them

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Wait this isn't pornhub!?

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The power to be yourself.

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The superpower to poo at will.

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The ability to teleport to distant locations with no way of returning.

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the power to vote

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The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

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the power to fall off of a cliff and live... in hell

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The power to touch the ground using only your feet

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!