The power to turn into a dogbed when somebody says micro-tacos

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The ability to pee as a gas, not a liquid

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The power to turn pizza into math worksheets. -Big C

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the power to pee on command

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the power to pee shit and shit piss.

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the power to kill yourself at will

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The power to move 7% faster.

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The power to shit yourself whenever other people are looking at you

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The power to convert Oxygen to Carbon Dioxide.

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The power to kill yourself to take out a criminal... except for the fact that when you kill yourself you literally might as well be throwing a marshmallow at someone.

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The ability to bring statues to life but they can't move or talk

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The power to have useless superpowers which can only be used at wrong times

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The power to RISE FROM YOUR GRAVE, only for becoming a homoerotic bodybuilder addicted to steroids made from white bull testicles, and eating so many that you eventually become a golden werewolf, a blue hedgehog or something like that...

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the power to lose your power at will

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The powers to have super speed when you can't run anymore.

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The power to be able to mate with squirrels and have offspring.

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the power to fly but only upward

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the power to forget all you learned when taking the final. just so u could remember it later...

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The power to play a flute with your ass

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The power to be Chuck Norris

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The power to time travel to the end of the world.

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The power to block bullets with only your pinky toe on your left foot.

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The power to run at blazing speed but loose intelligence as you excelerate.

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the power to not have a power

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!