The power to be -100% faster...

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the ability to taste so good it makes you wanna slap yo mama

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The power of creating poop.

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The power to take away your power.

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the power to bi ugly

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The power to trick yourself into thinking you have the power to trick yourself into thinking you have the power to trick yourself into thinking you have the power to…

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Ingesting caffeine gives you the power to be a normal, competent human being.

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The power to hate someone you don't even know

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The power to digest food 1% faster than normal on Tuesdays and 1% slower on Thursdays

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the power to walk through unlocked doors

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The power to regulate your body temperature at about 98 degrees at all times.

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The power to remember a song's name, but you forget when you want to search, write down, or talk about it.

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The power to shit rainbows but have incredible pain while shitting them.

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the power to save Chinese people... who needs um?

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The power to have no powers!

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The power to see light as it appears on an object.

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the ability to have every superpower that is pointless

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The power to teleport through open doors

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The power to win the lottery, but only the december 21 of 2012.

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The power to tie any type of knot but only when using dental floss

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The power to think of a witty comeback 3 days too late.

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The power to murder rocks.

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The ability to read minds by absorbing their mental disorders

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The power to realize that I am starting to sound (and type) more and more like Salvador Dali, and being proud because the man was a genius, the most fantastic thing he could do every morning, was to wake up with a person as fantastic as himself! And while he indeed walked a different path than most do, no one can deny his footprints are clearer than most... Perfection? A losers wish... to be outstanding... is a gift on its own. Moral: Yeah many of you see this as pointless, so I thought I could just as well add it. While I dream of the age where people stop looking for Gods and strengthen the most powerful tool in the universe: YOU.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!