Radiation resistance inversely proportional to the amount of radiation around you.

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The power to look beautiful/handsome when nobody is looking at you.

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You can read the minds of rocks.

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The power to naturally wake up at a certain time but only if you set an alarm.

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The ability to turn into Chuck Norris, then get round house kicked in the face and killed by the real Chuck Norris because there can only be one Chuck Norris.

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Being able to transform into anything on and off the planet, only, you have to be touching that object.

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The power to manipulate thermometers but not actually affect the temperature.

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the ability to make a banana talk uncontrollably to itself but only when people around it are high. the ability to make a banana momentarily stop talking. the ability to allow a banana to sing uncontrollably songs strictly about being a banana, previously sung by a mammal. the ability to write funny things but only about banana(s).

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The power to open a pickle jar in one try

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The power to have no power.

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the power to make sounds by vibrating your vocal cords.

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The power to eavesdrop on your best friend from anywhere in the world when he's sleeping.

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The power to microwave bread

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the ability to turn kfc into popeyes

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a bat and the other is a baby.

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The power to give yourself a sinus infection

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The power to pass sociology/psychology class by making yourself a hated internet meme by triggering negative emotions in a subject only using a simple word, only to discover later that it has turned into a compulsion. Moral, yep now you hate me, good day to you sir! Moral: There.

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The power to die when touching any form of light

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The power to take away your power.

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The power to have every superpower ever (including pointless ones) for one second every full moon, then have every pointless one for the rest of the time.

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To call me maybe

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The power to make your parents walk into your room whenever you're masturbating.

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The power to read a dictionary in under 48 hours

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The power to make everyone you touch see nothing but porn

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!