The power to make any woman have volcanic earth.shattering orgasms but only if she's having sex with another man

thumb_up thumb_down +38

The power to shit purple butterflies.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Black power

thumb_up thumb_down +38

The power to light yourself on fire but not be immune to fire

thumb_up thumb_down +22

the power to persuade every 80 yo into penetrating you analy

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The power to read someone's mind, but only if they're thinking of tacos.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

the power to eat when you have already ate from a few hours ago

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Radiation resistance inversely proportional to the amount of radiation around you.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

The power to look beautiful/handsome when nobody is looking at you.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

You can read the minds of rocks.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

The ability to turn into Chuck Norris, then get round house kicked in the face and killed by the real Chuck Norris because there can only be one Chuck Norris.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Being able to transform into anything on and off the planet, only, you have to be touching that object.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

The power to manipulate thermometers but not actually affect the temperature.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

the ability to make a banana talk uncontrollably to itself but only when people around it are high. the ability to make a banana momentarily stop talking. the ability to allow a banana to sing uncontrollably songs strictly about being a banana, previously sung by a mammal. the ability to write funny things but only about banana(s).

thumb_up thumb_down -34

The power to open a pickle jar in one try

thumb_up thumb_down -38

The power to have no power.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

the power to make sounds by vibrating your vocal cords.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

The power to microwave bread

thumb_up thumb_down -76

the ability to turn kfc into popeyes

thumb_up thumb_down -84

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a bat and the other is a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -86

The power to give yourself a sinus infection

thumb_up thumb_down +111

The power to die when touching any form of light

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The power to take away your power.

thumb_up thumb_down +73

The power to have every superpower ever (including pointless ones) for one second every full moon, then have every pointless one for the rest of the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +71

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!