making http://pointlesssuperpowers.com/

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The power to keep hair from growing on your head forever.

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The power to turn into a dogbed when somebody says micro-tacos

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The power to shapeshift, but only when below ground.

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The power to have a small penis

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the power to pee shit and shit piss.

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The power to digest food 1% faster than normal on Tuesdays and 1% slower on Thursdays

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The power to excrete food colouring from your sweat glands.

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wast your time on the computer

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The power to help bitches stay alive! Bitches love staying alive!

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The power to move 7% faster.

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The power to convert Oxygen to Carbon Dioxide.

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the power to eat 10 cotton balls every year

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The ability to unravel a ball of yarn with your mind

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The power to have superhuman strength. But I have to jack off to do so.

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The power to levitate birds while they are flying....

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The power to poop out your penis.

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The power to breathe without thinking about it.

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having superpowers during the inquisition

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The ability to travel back in time when and where there was a major plague- bringing only the clothes you are wearing.

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The powers to have super speed when you can't run anymore.

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the power to fly two inches above solid ground at the speed you walk

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The power to fall off a tree, then land in spikes.

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Spontaneous combustion... when on the internet

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!