the power to pee on command

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The power to turn pizza into math worksheets. -Big C

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the power to kill yourself at will

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The power to agree to the "Terms of Service" without actually reading them.

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the power to see through bananas

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The power to kill yourself to take out a criminal... except for the fact that when you kill yourself you literally might as well be throwing a marshmallow at someone.

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The power to turn on the TV with the remote

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The power to take huge shits at will.

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the power to lose your power at will

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The power to be able to mate with squirrels and have offspring.

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the power to fly but only upward

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The ability to lose all your limbs on command.

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The power to play a flute with your ass

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The power to be Helen Keller at will.

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The power of night-blindness.

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The power of superspeed...which comes with horrible stamina and Asthma.

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The power to look what is at the back of your head.

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the power to not have a power

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the ability to hold your breath for ever while being on land

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The power to stop writing stupid shit on the internet.

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the distinct ability to tell when a marine plant is mildly displeased with it's cells.

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The power to die at will.

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The power to see the future when you sleep but forget it as soon as you wake up

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!