The power to vote for Osama Bin Laden for president. Moral: And to believe it could still be worse...

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the power to eat with your butt

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The power to part clouds when there are no clouds.

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The ability to teleport to distant locations with no way of returning.

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The power to bleed for 3-7 days for a week every month, and still live..

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The power to be fat only when your at a party.

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An ability to exist without any food but only after you eat some food.

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the power to hate nature

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The power to die and come back as a invincible bug that lives for 5 seconds

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The power of being mysterious. Terribly mysterious. And possibly being capable of cutting guns in half with one's mind.

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the power to turn people to stone but only if you look in the mirror

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The ability to pass gas and have it smell like coffee from Starbucks.

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The power to shoot poop balls when you masterbate.

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The pewer to kill elderly people by sneaking up behind them and yelling: MORTAL KOMBAAAAAAAT!

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The power to see light as it appears on an object.

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The power to do anything within your limits.

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The power to be able to get up 11.5% quicker than the average perosn

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the power to steal other peoples super powers but only if they dont have any

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The power to move objects by touching them.

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The superpower to have a superpower

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Writing "because moral man loves you" Moral: I am far too antisocial to love everyone, I mean the more love for me the better... so I can give a lot to my girlfriend too... love you baby! (my girlfriend duh) Moral 2: Someday ill tell her that I type this comments, and if you thumb this up, she will find out I declared my love here too... aww... love the man that does not love you... for love! Me: Huh? My head is spinning... and if yours is too, then thumb this comment up.

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the power to become phil collins, but only after peter gabrial left

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The power to Lee when your near a toilet

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Having the ability to drink bleach and not die. You only get really sick.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!