the power to do something amazing, when no one's looking.

power to breathe

the ability to take a fart that other people can actually see.

to be able to eat any type of food, even indian food and then poop it out the next day

The power to fail hard at the catchphra (or whatever its called) simply because you keep answering garbage when it asks "what is the jummiest!" Moral: I work out hard dammit! I want muscles of steel! And Bananasplit contains banana (duh) which just binds fat and makes me look like a bodybuilder... (yes I did look like that and would eat garbage rather than banana, I mean most "family restaurant" foo out there is garbage) "Family restaurant" guide, because moral man loves you: Mc Donalds, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Burger King, and I really need fats and proteins to work out as hard as I do... I mean I am running on a uh.. stand still training bicycle thingie... too tired to look it up.

The power to shoot string cheese out of your fingers.

the ability to turn on lamps but you have to be touching them

Being able to shapeshift into a grandpa then not being able to turn back until next year

Reverse Pooping

The ability to have every pointless superpower then, now, and in the future.

The power that, eveything you touch turns into whatever it already was

The power too be a professonal hacker but a kid could delete it.

The pointless super power of take a shit in your own mouth!

the power to make youtube videos buffer twice as fast on your iPhone.

The power to speak to mexicans in german

the power to poop dogs without fur.

The power to read a book in 2 seconds but forget everything but the title.

The ability to catch anything on fire, but only if it is already on fire

Teh pewer too dissablee speeltjeck Mortal: KOMBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!

The power to die whenever you want.

The power to grow increasingly warm fur as your body temperature rises.

The power to give ANY girl the best orgasm she will ever have, but only when in Vatnajökulsþjóðgarður, Iceland. Between the local time of 3am-3:15am.

beeing the dragonborn, when there are no dragons....

The power to jump -50% higher

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!